Dear Manasseh Azure,
I will do the usual Ghanaian thing by apologising first to you, knowing perhaps you are still enjoying your honeymoon days with Serwaa, then still go ahead and crave for your attention. And I believe on this very occasion, you will also feign ‘OK’ with my seemingly obstruction and at least lend me your ears for some few minutes.
Last weekend [August 20, 2016], you married Serwaa, a lady whose name is even more popular than a political party in Ghana. Her beauty with brains accompanied by character [from the confirmation we get from you and her associates] succeeded in convincing many that you, Manasseh Azure, can be sent to Madina market for ‘goods’ and they can be sure you will bring the best home.
Your wedding pictures got so many people praising you because the pictures were so nice to see. You can attempt reading the avalanche of messages if you haven’t. Believe you me, you have a lot to read. But I can do you a favour by making it short for you. People are happy with your marriage between Serwaa and wish both of you well.
You may ask me, is this the reason I asked for your attention?, No, it isn’t. The reason is that your marriage to Serwaa resuscitated the discussion of whether one can marry someone he or she meets on social media. You come into the picture because you made us understand how you met Serwaa. It all started with the ‘I look you, you look me’ thing you both did in a certain town at Western Region of Ghana, the next 30 minutes a message appeared on Facebook then the conversation started. Only God knows how you were going to be connected back if not for Mark Zuckerberg’s Facebook when you both refused to exchange contact when you met face to face.You were candid when you mentioned the role Facebook, a social media platform, played in your connection with Serwaa. Such frankness deserves all the commendation.
By now, it should be clear to anyone that you got married to Facebook Serwaa. Therefore the question of can someone marry a person from social media should have been answered by your marriage with Serwaa. But there is more to the question than meets the eyeball. So, a simple answer of yes doesn’t sufficiently address the question.With this question, people want to know whether it is also right to marry from social media? As a beneficiary of social media, I believe this discussion may interest you. This is the reason why I bring your attention on such a discussion.
Some people, since the advent of social media, have been against marriages from this medium. To the extent that, some preach against marrying a social media friend. Their reason is that of possible fear of marrying an imposter or people pretending to be something they are not. The ballooning divorce rate in our dispensation also doesn’t favour marriages of people who meet on a virtual world.
Anthropological research has proven that a careful background check of a potential suitor is necessary condition for stability of marriage but not sufficient enough to guarantee that. It therefore stands to reason that, social media (virtual world) wouldn’t have been a good means for people to study themselves before marriage if it were the only medium of interaction, for this reason, it is riskier compared to the traditional face to face interaction.
Frankly, these reasons are compelling and can’t be swept under the carpet. But they can be addressed. I must say the possible way to go about them which I present here is no different from what happened exactly between Serwaa and you.
As a people, we need to come to terms with the increasing widening scope of our marriage market. We are in an era where social media is permeating in all aspects of our society.Stories about how couples meet have always been funny and so it shouldn’t come as a surprise now when people have their point of meeting as social media.People need to disabuse their minds of the thinking that it is wrong to marry others they meet on social media.Our society too should desist from ridiculing such people.
Nonetheless, there is a caveat which must be made clear. It is not enough to hide behind the screens accompanied by some keys and be proposing marriage. Rather, social media presents us with yet an opportunity to connect with others,who, in most cases, wouldn’t have come our way.
The meeting of a social media friend should be seen as a means towards an end determined and agreed upon by both parties. It is not an end in itself. In order words, the meeting of someone on social media doesn’t stop with the interaction on that virtual world. As much as possible, there should be physical contact in addition to all other means necessary to know more about people. While people are encouraged to tread cautiously in this endeavour, in doing so, they should remember, as has been pointed out earlier, this is only necessary condition for stability of marriage but not sufficient enough to guarantee it. This couldn’t have only worked because it involved the personalities of Manasseh and Serwaa. It is workable for all who want to take advantage.
Therefore, on any day, when the question is asked whether one can marry a social media friend, the answer for me is yes because there are more Serwaas who can get married to their Manassehs after having done due diligence to the process of marriage.
Once again, congratulations to both of you on your marriage. You have joined the league of ‘Mr and Mrs’.The rest of us will follow sooner or later.Forgive me if I didn’t ask how things are going so far? This is because I believe with Manasseh in charge and Serwaa supporting, everything is under control.